beautiful seconds (OC x Gou)
by ikthur
Summary: watch as this "young man" constantly attempts and fails to find true love.
1. Chapter 1

My name is Hanamachi "Hope" Sakuragi. I'm the swim club captain of my school. I joined when I was in first year and I automatically got in because they saw how big my biceps were. Well.. I think they did. But Gou. Oh Gou.. she turns me on so damn much. I get an erection every time I hear it's name. her long red hair, and her.. perky breasts. Oh god, I got hard lol

But there's only one thing that's stopping me from jumping her and that's her baka of a brother, Rin Matsuika? Or was it Mutuika? Wahtevar, it doesn't matter anyways. Gou would still let me in when she sees my huge dick. haha I'm chick magnet material. I know I am because my mom always told me so. It's not like I'm bragging or anything.. I'm just stating the facts. Shout out to my mom in Osaka btw. She'll be so happy once I bring home a hot chick for the first time. She'll be so proud to hear that I touched a chick's hand and actually talking to her without soiling my pants.

A few days ago.. or maybe it was yesterday? Last month? Well.. on that day I passed by Gou in the hallway. I saw her eyes scanning my very hot bod. I know she wants me. I can tell. What a slut. I like that. She went inside the girl's restroom. Maybe she was imagining about how big my dick is and how it feels inside of her. Oh yeah. "Hanamachi I want your babies! Impregnate me now." I've never been with a girl beffo.. none of them are worthy of my body anyways. I've been reserving myself for the right one and I think I finally found her. I know she wants me. But she's just keeping it a secret. Because she knows there will be too much competition for me.

I've gained 50 pounds of muscle this week. I don't know hw I got it by just sitting down. I'm leveling up my Paladin to level 14. I bet girls think I'm really cool. My mom thinks so.

Today, we were supposed to order our Samezuka unifoms for the swim club. I told them I was size 11, but they kept telling me I was a size 20. But it was pretty clear size 11 was already too big for me, maybe they're just trying to mess with me 'cause they jealous like hell lmao

But I won't let it get to me because I'm way awesome because my mom thinks so. I'm pretty sure Gou thinks that way too. Love you, boo.

*26 days later

Today, I decided to send Gou a love letter. Looks like she's been pretending to ignore me for too long. Playing hard to get, that slut. But I still love herand she's still my bitch. Poor Gou, she just doesn't get it.

I forgot to buy pretty stationery yesterday, so I decided to write it on a piece of toilet paper that was stuck on my shoe. Fate has strange ways, no? Love really does find a way.

Toilet paper isn't a romantic thing but I'm sure Gou will understand. She's the one who's way into me anyway.

"Dearest Gou-chan,

Babe, I know you want me. And, I want you too. It's okay, you don't need to pretend anymore. You aren't the best pretender anyway. I can see your desire. It's pretty obvious. I can see you staring at me during the tournaments. You really can't hold it in, can you? Well, let's not complicate this further. If you want to meet me, which I am sure of, randevuu with me outside your school after swommeng practice"

-Youres Alwez

Dark Paladin

I left the love letter in Gou's locker once I used my awesome ninja skillz to infiltrate her school. I can't believe no one caught me. My plan went without a hitch. Have I ever mentioned that my mom thinks I'm awesome? I haven't practiced ninjitsu ever and yet I seem to be a master.

Gou should see the letter anytime. She has a free period next, according to my "research".

I decided that I'd arrive fashionably late because it's awesome. She'd be willing to wait since she's head over heels for me.


	2. Chapter 2

I had the creepiest experience today. Free period started so I headed to my locker. I found this random guy's I.D in there. And seeing that he's from Samezuka, I decided to ask my brother. So I texted him

"Onii-chan, something weird happened. This guy from your school put his I.D in my locker. Hanamachi Sakuragi. He looks kinda creepy, he's chubby(?) and a little overweight. He looks really perverted. What should I do? I'm scared."

Surprisingly he texted back right away. "On my way there." I waited for him at the gate. He arrived around 10 minutes later with a piece of toilet paper.

"Onii-chan! You're really here," I called out to him.

He held the dirty toilet paper near my face.

"Ah, what's this?"

"It's a stupid love letter," he frowned in disgust. "For 'dearest Gou-chan.'"

I stared at it for a moment.. damn his handwriting's messy. I can barely make out the words.

"…..I know you _want_ me? I don't even know the guy!" I glanced at onii-chan for a response. It was like he didn't hear me. Figures. He never listens.

"'randevuu'? Is this guy a 5 year old? Jeez.. I can't deal with this. Onii-chan—"

"Gou," onii-chan suddenly spoke. His tone was surprisingly stern. "What time does swim practice end here?"

"A- huh?"

"Make sure you're with Haru and the others when you leave later," onii-chan turned away. I didn't understand what he was trying to tell me though.

"But what did you mean by love letter?"

"..didn't you read it?"

"I couldn't understand it. It was too messy!" I snorted.

Then there was this small pause.

"…"

"I'll take care of it, Gou," he said as he started to walk away.

Onii-chan is _so_ cool! Was he always this cool?


	3. Chapter 3

Author's Note: I wonder if people would really read this? This is written in Hope's pov, so I hope (no pun intended huehuehue) you get how much of a loser he is. The mistakes are done on purpose to double the assholery of Hope. Enjoy~! ;) *wink led to a seizure*

I waited to arrive like.. 10 minutes late cuz, you know, I'm a bad, bad boy. I didn't even bother to make myself look presentable. We see each other all the time anyway and she knows what I look like. I wonder how Gou is taking it. She must be really excited and anxious waiting for me. As I approached my meeting spot, I spotted a red figure. I wanted to take time to look at her before we talked.. .Did she cut her hair or something? Wait.. she seems a bit taller. She's coming this way.

**Shit** is that Rin Matuoki? Moriyama?! YAMANAKA?! **OKUMURA?!** Well.. whatever. I guess I lost it. Doesn't really matter. What is this baka doing here? I bet he's here to challenge me to a swimwear contest. What a doosh. And why does he look so pissed? I revealed myself. There's no need to worry. He can't take me with that skinny ass of his. I'm roughly 60lbs heavier. Rin has some balls deciding to pick a fight with me. It's so obvious that my dick is bigger than his. He should know I'm also in the basketball club. I got my ties. My homies.

"Oi! The fuck are you hiding there?" Rin said holding a piece of what looks like toilet paper. What a loser, weirdo. "You taking a shit or something? Maybe you'll need this"

"W-what are you talking a-about?!" I pretended to be weak so that he wouldn't run away. Pussy. I am the heir to the throne in Gou's heart. Nothing can stop me. Even Rin can't stop me. So I ran towards him. "Power walked" as others would call it, and grabbed the toilet paper from him.

"w-who wrote this..?" I pretended not to know. I'm such a professional actor. I should do it for a living. Maybe after I find a cure for cancer.

"My sister found this in her locker..." he sighed, holding up an I.D. "How the_ fuck_ did this get there? _You _tell me that."

"My I.D. how'd it get there?"

This loser. He stole it from me when I wasn't looking. That creep. Maybe he has a thing for me too. Unfortunately I'm not into loser ass thin bitches.

"Stop pretending that your sister found it. I know you took it from me because you're jealous of me, my good looks and awesome ab. I can beat you in swimming anytime." I said as I stepped closer to him. Why is he here anyway? Where's Gou, my babe? "Stop getting in the way, Rin. Your sister _wants_ me. I'm making it easier for her. You should be thankful."

"DON'T FUCK WITH ME!" He threw my I.D. at me and it gave me an owwie. Now I have a blemish and it's his entire fault. I'll pay him back, that super baka.

"Y-You think you're- you're smarter than me? Better than me?!" I said while twiddling my thumbs. It's habit. Don't judge me. I'm better than this. "I-I challenge you to.. to a SWIMMING CONTEST! "

"You're on, fat ass!" Rin takes off his shirt. Psht. MY body's better. "Let's go!"

I ripped my shirt off too but instead of a second, it took me 10 minutes. It take time to show off a master piece. The slower it is, the hotter it gets. That's a fact! Ugh, no one is awesome enough to know that anyway. So stupid… All of you are stupid. Everyone's dumb but me.

"We'll use the Iwatobi swimming pool!"

~cliffhanger.. oooh, so interesting =_=~


End file.
